Comments on: Can someone please proof read my piece and give me feedback ? http://treatingarthritis.info/21560/can-someone-please-proof-read-my-piece-and-give-me-feedback/ Arthritis Treatment and Cures! Thu, 09 Feb 2012 13:49:19 +0000 hourly 1 http://wordpress.org/?v=3.2.1 By: flamingochick http://treatingarthritis.info/21560/can-someone-please-proof-read-my-piece-and-give-me-feedback/comment-page-1/#comment-10241 flamingochick Mon, 22 Mar 2010 22:09:16 +0000 #comment-10241 I have incorporated the corrections into the text below: After reading "The Itch," I immediately thought of the experiences I witnessed when my father was ill. M's and my father's experiences are very similar. The doctors treated them both like guinea pigs and were not able to figure out what caused their illnesses or treatments for their illnesses. My father’s right foot had gotten very swollen, like the size of a football turned red and was warm to the touch; he was not able to put any pressure on his right foot at all. My brother and I decided to take my father to the emergency room, because he was not able to tolerate the pain. The doctors initially had diagnosed my father with gout, which is a medical condition that usually presents with recurrent attacks of acute inflammatory arthritis. The doctors then released my father from the hospital and prescribed him with pain medication. Later that same night my father’s condition got worse, and we had to take him back to hospital. The doctors notified us that they were going to keep him overnight to perform several tests to figure out what caused the symptoms to get worse. After a few days my father was again released from the hospital with the same diagnosis and with more prescription drugs. Three days later my father was having unbearable pain, and we had to take him into the emergency room. Once again the doctors were stunned to see us there, and they were left clueless. They could not figure out what was the cause of the swollen foot. They performed more tests and came up with a second diagnosis. This time they said my father might have an infection in his foot, but they were not sure and would have to do more tests and MRIs to find out for sure. After performing many tests they still were not able to come up with a definite answer, and many different doctors were called and they asked the same questions repeatedly. When did your foot start to get swollen? What do you think caused this problem? So on and so forth. The doctors then decided that it was an infection in the right foot and they would have to perform surgery. My father was desperate. He was tired of being in bed and in the hospital. He was also very frustrated with why the doctors were not able to find a cure for his problem. A few days later the surgery was performed on the right foot and the doctors said “there was no infection found in the foot,” yet it remained swollen. Similarly, as doctors were not able to find a cure to M’s itch, they were not able to find a cure for my father’s swollen foot and basically treated them as guinea pigs, because they found their problems out of the ordinary. Their conditions gave them a chance to experiment with them. They basically took chances not knowing the outcome; they did not think to see if what they were doing would cure the patient or make their symptoms worse. [There needs to be more of a conclusion. Perhaps a statement of how a patient should respond to being treated in such a manner by the doctors. How did your dad respond after the surgery to be told there was no infection? What was the ultimate outcome? Are we to accept our role as guinea pigs because doctors are more educated in medicine than we are or should we expect more from them? Would it be better for them to say, "We don't know what's wrong."?] I have incorporated the corrections into the text below:

After reading “The Itch,” I immediately plotting of the experiences I witnessed when my member of the clergy was ill. M’s and my member of the clergy’s experiences are very similar. The doctors treated them both like guinea pigs and were not able to figure out what caused their illnesses or treatments for their illnesses.

My member of the clergy’s right foot had gotten very swollen, like the size of a football turned red and was warm to the touch; he was not able to place any pressure on his right foot at all. My brother and I chose to take my member of the clergy to the emergency room, because he was not able to tolerate the pain. The doctors initially had diagnosed my member of the clergy with gout, which is a medical shape up that usually presents with recurrent attacks of acute inflammatory arthritis. The doctors then released my member of the clergy from the hospital and prescribed him with pain medication. Later that same nighttime my member of the clergy’s shape up got worse, and we had to take him back to hospital. The doctors told us that they were going to keep him overnight to perform numerous tests to figure out what caused the symptoms to get worse. After a few days my member of the clergy was again released from the hospital with the same diagnosis and with more prescription drugs.

Three days later my member of the clergy was having unbearable pain, and we had to take him into the emergency room. Once again the doctors were stunned to see us there, and they were left clueless. They could not figure out what was the cause of the swollen foot. They performed more tests and came up with a second diagnosis. This time they said my member of the clergy might have an infection in his foot, but they were not sure and would have to do more tests and MRIs to find out for sure.

After the theater many tests they still were not able to come up with a certain answer, and many different doctors were called and they questioned the same questions repeatedly. When did your foot start to get swollen? What do you reckon caused this problem? So on and so forth. The doctors then chose that it was an infection in the right foot and they would have to perform surgery. My member of the clergy was desperate. He was tired of being in bed and in the hospital. He was also very frustrated with why the doctors were not able to find a cure for his problem. A few days later the surgery was performed on the right foot and the doctors said “there was no infection establish in the foot,” yet it remained swollen.

Also, as doctors were not able to find a cure to M’s itch, they were not able to find a cure for my member of the clergy’s swollen foot and basically treated them as guinea pigs, because they establish their problems out of the ordinary. Their conditions gave them a chance to experiment with them. They basically took chances not knowing the outcome; they did not reckon to see if what they were doing would cure the patient or make their symptoms worse.

[There needs to be more of a conclusion. Perhaps a statement of how a patient should respond to being treated in such a manner by the doctors. How did your dad respond after the surgery to be told there was no infection? What was the ultimate outcome? Are we to accept our role as guinea pigs because doctors are more educated in medicine than we are or should we expect more from them? Would it be better for them to say, "We don't know what's incorrect."?]

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